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CHRONICLE UNIVERSITY,
A first-year English student named Alex Thorne had a very weird academic moment last Tuesday. He was just about to hand in his huge, 15-page essay, titled "Why Commas Are So Scary," when the entire stack of paper suddenly caught fire! It wasn't a big, noisy blast, but more of a short, contained puff of smoke right on his desk. People who saw it happen said they could still smell the faint, smoky smell of perfectly neat, finished homework.
Alex, who is 18, didn't panic for long. He quickly gathered the small handful of fine gray dust, which was all that was left of his hard work, and rushed it to his strict teacher, Professor Eldridge Krum. “I tried to tell him that the paper’s sources were totally correct, but it was just ash,” Alex told The Quad Reporter.
The Professor looked very carefully at the pile of ashes. He decided the original ideas in the paper deserved a good B+, but then he gave Alex an extra, rare grade: an A+! This was for “showing incredible effort and for the dramatic, unfortunate end of the document.”
The university is now trying to figure out what caused the fire. The leading theory suggests that Alex had put too much pressure on the paper. The fire was probably caused by a bad mix of high stress, too much coffee, and storing five different, detailed rule books for writing essays (like MLA and APA) too close together. The academic staff is now telling all students to keep their important assignments separate and relaxed.
